sifu hotman @everysplendidsun@eldritch.cafe

https://youtu.be/hgXxDFvfdhM

want to be mountain lion proportions of responsible, brave, and integrous.

scars can be misleading in that their tissue has virtually no sensation, yet holds memory.

& I will always hold onto that, no matter who tries to tell me im wrong for it.
The earth has a soul, the earth is alive and does feel things. Every thing is alive.

thank you.

mistreatment of the neurodivergent, of those with disabilities +mental illness, mistreatment of women, mistreatment of certain ethnicities, sexual shame/taboo, disrespect of art/creativity self expression, mistreatment of our earth, ecosystems and all its inhabitants.
Basically the root of violence and misery.
Its so strange. Where did this all happen, when n y?
I think its easier for humans to deny discomfort than face it. And its normalized.
To me, sensitivity IS normal

themes repeat themselves. A major one is the denouncement of sensitivity. Its is as if humans at large deal with the discomfort, uncertainty, and difficulty of being human, by creating all kinds of silly ways to separate ourselves from being human, causing us all to suffer. The ones who resist this rift most are the ones labeled as "sensitives."
And i honestly believe this craving to destroy our humanness/sensitivity, is the root of things like

Sometimes theres a point where I ponder whether the idea of "sensitivity" is really valid, and not just a labeling of the fundamentals of most living beings functionalities for survival.
I think that there are certain "sensitivities" peculiar to certain species, like humans.
Often I have heard "You are so sensitive."
Sometimes this is beheld as a positive trait, while others say it with a certain disapproval.
We live in a world where across nations we can see the same -

you may not be able to read this but you are somewhere out there and I know you can feel me when i say that I Will Always Love You. Please live. You have to. you will find your greatest treasures in this lifetime. You will find all the love you need, i promise. I love you i love you i love you
and i will do everything i do in the name of loving you. You deserve it.

self isolation tactics disguising themselves as the idea of ceasing verbal communication entirely

spirit on the floor, crying
"i dont want to go on without him"
dressed in white
unintelligible face
yet felt her sadness still.

gave her some space
oatmeal
and tea

"we'll be okay. we can keep going."

wall-e is the greatest love story. adieu

i know the whole flower=vulva thing is nothing new, but yeah.
Even in arousal it feels like my sex spaces are blooming in warmth.

some flowers remind me of certain parts of a vulva.
There is a peony carved into my lute and the petal shapes remind me of labia minora and its just very touching to me in a strange way.
As in, it makes me feel affection for the delicateness of my own genitals.

in true love,
you are the holder and the held
the kisser and the kissed
the lover, and the loved.
its a constant overlapping of giving and receiving, so in union that you cannot even tell the difference anymore.

gnight now.see ya l8r punkz and rebels and uprisers and

the bees- i love you

posting some of my art, because i like it and i can

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EM1Fqi7JiQQ

https://youtu.be/Q7zGeQv_4Fk

allow me to introduce you to chinese lutes. The amount of soul and energy in them is something I have yet to feel from most other sound-making beings.
they are extremely versatile, and captivating in aesthetic and sound.
Not to mention the discipline they require to play makes it all the more rewarding to play them.
I feel very connected to mine in a way i have not felt with any other instrument. English resources are scarce, however instruments go beyond words.