phoenyx @phoenyxgreene@eldritch.cafe

I am having the hardest time focusing on literally anything 🥴 it took me 10 mins to type this

Y’all I went driving AGAIN! look at ya girl being consistent and shit 😉

Tbh, part of the reason I haven’t posted pics on here in forever is that I started using a new app for Mastodon & it won’t let me add alt text to pictures and ion like dat 😔

I changed my pic. I’m okay with being perceived today 🥰

My friends being all proud of me is about to make me CRY 🥺😭
HELP.

I also still managed to work out today and I applied for a few more jobs so today was extremely productive and I’m over the moon about it.

I went with my mom to the car wash and had just finished telling her how I think I’m finally ready to try and get my license. Her bf pulled up on us and as they were washing the car, she told him. He was like oh word? Let’s go. I drove around with them in the car for a bit which I’ve done with my mother previously. Then, he told her to get out and made me drive by myself but followed in his car. They said I did great so yeah I’m v emotional.

Soooooo, I drove my mom’s car all by myself today, you guyssssss 🥰 (I am 29 and terrified of driving, I’ve had a permit since 2010, meaning I took the test twice just to avoid taking the driving test. So, this is HUGE step.)

So I posted this jokingly on Facebook and people are saying they would totally subscribe 🤔😂

An onlyfans but it’s just me doing self care 😂

Can I just get paid for existing? I’m tired 🥴

Also, watching other people live their best lives is kinda getting to me 🥴 I should prob stay tf off social media.

Had my evaluation for meds yesterday. Not happy about it. I just wanted to have something for panic attacks but they want me to go back on daily meds (as well as a just in case med). The daily med is something I took already and didn’t like the side effects which made me quit taking meds all together years ago. Feeling conflicted.

Apparently I’m just not meant to get a job 😭

I literally think “I’m so gay” anytime I look at anyone of any gender that I find attractive. What is that? Lmaoooo

Guess I’ll just smoke and drink and try to entertain myself 🙄

I would go online shopping but I’m scared to spend so 😩

Once again, everyone’s been asleep for a while. I’m awake, I’m lonely and it doesn’t look like I’ll get sleepy anytime soon 🥴

Didn’t work out like I wanted to either and I have to leave in a little while to grab a few extra ingredients for dinner. I’m making myself some broccoli because I barely ate and I don’t want to end up with a migraine. So yeah, no more sleeping pills. Idk what I gotta do to get some rest but it can’t be that.

I really shouldn’t have taken sleeping meds to sleep last night but I was just really sad. My partner and I talked a lot which helped a little bit definitely didn’t make it all better. I just didn’t want to be up all night so I took a sleeping pill and put some calm drops in my water. When I tell you I got out of bed around 10:30 and I’m just now starting to feel fully awake. I was so groggy I couldn’t even eat the breakfast I made for myself.