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question, trans name stuff, birth names ment. 

trans people (*only* if you're comfortable) how did you come by your current chosen name? i could only do 4 options, please feel free to comment <3

question, trans name stuff, birth names ment. 

@ratsdontcry its a nickname someone started calling me while i was figuring things out, it felt good so i stuck with it :3

question, trans name stuff, birth names ment. 

@deletescape awww i love this,,

re: question, trans name stuff, birth names ment. 

@ratsdontcry i misheard someone calling me that and basically just asked them if they could keep calling me that cuz it slaps

re: question, trans name stuff, birth names ment. 

@pastelpunkbandit ahhh that's pretty epic- :o

@cadence absolutely, it's a good one 馃憣馃徎馃憣馃徎

re: question, trans name stuff, birth names ment. 

@ratsdontcry I created an account on the fediverse which no longer exists, with the name and was like "Oh, I actually really like this". If you mean first names only.

re: question, trans name stuff, birth names ment. 

@photonicfae that's neat!! feel free to talk about first name(s) and middle/other names! :)

re: question, trans name stuff, birth names ment. 

@ratsdontcry My last name is because I'm a creative, poetic etc and like to imagine leaving things in the universe that bring joy and inspire others, that others can change and use for themselves as long as they're ethical about it.

re: question, trans name stuff, birth names ment. 

@photonicfae that's really beautiful!

re: question, trans name stuff, birth names ment. 

@ratsdontcry 鈽猴笍

question, trans name stuff, birth names ment. 

@ratsdontcry birth name but in a different language. power move, eh?

caps, question, trans name stuff, birth names ment. 

@anarchiv SUCH a power move 馃憣馃徎

caps, question, trans name stuff, birth names ment. 

@ratsdontcry thanks! :heart_nb:

re question, trans name stuff, birth names ment. 

@ratsdontcry I made a long list of names that I liked and then spent like half a year figuring out which one I like the most

re question, trans name stuff, birth names ment. 

@AgathaSorceress i kind of relate to this tbh,,

question, trans name stuff, birth names ment. 

@ratsdontcry It's a nickname I've already used online years before figuring out that I'm non-binary, and it slowly sneaked into my offline life as well.

I used the English version of the noun elsewhere before (I'm not an English native speaker), but it was already in use by an admin on a "new" platform I joined. So a friend suggested I could use the Latin translation instead, and I've kept that one for nearly 20 years by now.

question, trans name stuff, birth names ment. 

@silentium wow..that's really interesting thanks for sharing!

question, trans name stuff, birth names ment. 

@ratsdontcry I have plenty of names for all kind of different places and situations. Honestly lately choosing a new name mostly comes down to generate a few random names and coose one of them. :D

question, trans name stuff, birth names ment. 

@VonBirne oooh i love this energy!!

question, trans name stuff, birth names ment. 

@ratsdontcry I went down a list of baby names for my year and picked the first one I thought was okay

and tbh I don't *like* it, I don't like being called it. not sure if that's internalised transphobia or it just not being a good name for me.

I vibe much more with just being called 522 but I can't really tell people to call me that in the real world

so i'm kinda in name limbo where I *have* one but I hate using it

question, trans name stuff, birth names ment. 

@5225225 oof that does sound like a tricky situation... for what it's worth though- I think that if you want to be called 522 in the real world then you absolutely deserve to be, and people should respect that.

question, trans name stuff, birth names ment. 

@ratsdontcry spending immense amounts of time considering meaning and what it means to us and finding what feels right and thinking of symbolic meanings and so on until finding stuff that feels right.

question, trans name stuff, birth names ment. 

@lindenbow this sounds really powerful and beautiful 馃挏

question, trans name stuff, birth names ment. 

@ratsdontcry i changed my legal name to my fursona's name :3c

question, trans name stuff, birth names ment. 

@xavin good for you! power move!!

question, trans name stuff, birth names ment. 

@ratsdontcry I compiled a list (vierkantor.com/troep/voornamen) of all names used by both men and women* in the country I live in, sorted the list in order of popularity, and chose the first one pronounceable in my wife's native language. My name is optimal, and I have the maths to prove it :D

* This is what the government actually believes. :(

question, trans name stuff, birth names ment. 

@Vierkantor very interesting!! very efficient, congratulations! xD

re: question, trans name stuff, birth names ment. 

@Vierkantor I'm French but I speak Dutch and English so I was curious about your list, and the name I feel most strongly towards is鈥 second in that list :amaze: (I love feeling validated by a random internet encounter!) @ratsdontcry

trans name stuff 

@ratsdontcry i found names, listed the ones i could imagine using and then one just felt good. it hasn't felt explicitly good, but i don't hate it and it's better than names i have previously used

question, trans name stuff, birth names ment. 

@ratsdontcry I actually used the name I put on my game characters for as long as I remember, it just felt natural

question, trans name stuff, birth names ment. 

@LiziPancake that makes a lot of sense!!

question, trans name stuff, birth names ment. 

@ratsdontcry My name I came up with and then realized it was similar after the fact.

question, trans name stuff, birth names ment. 

@ratsdontcry was using it for made up identity in games and websites for years, it was practical and kinda gender neutral so I didn't hesitate much ^^

@ratsdontcry
what I did was basically this:
1. grab the latest census data for Finland (where I am), which has two lists of first names and the number of people who have them as legal names (one list for legally-men, another for legally-women)

conveniently, the name change system is set up so that if a name is present on the list corresponding to your legal gender marker at the time of applying, they don't do any kind of gatekeeping - a tiny fee, a little wait, no questions asked

2. then I used those to make a list containing only the names that were present on *both* lists, and the counts for each, and the bigger of the two counts divided by the smaller one (a "neutrality multiplier", if you will)

here's a semi-random example off the list (not my name):
"Muisto, 39 men, 46 women, 46/39=1.179"

3. then I sorted the list by the result of that division and picked through the top to find one I liked

because it's present in the list corresponding to my legal gender marker, I got the change done quick and cheap, and because it's also in the other list with a similar count this information isn't enough to even confidently guess what that gender marker is (or whether I've changed it since)

...therefore achieving a gender-secrecy preserving name! It made perfect sense at the time

@ratsdontcry I still have that sorted list around and I give copies out to people who might meet people questioning their gender

it's already made one baby maybe-trans very happy that I know of

@nonparticular that's really cool thanks for sharing!! 馃挌 and i'd love to see that list tbh!

@ratsdontcry masto won't let me upload a 11kb plaintext file, got any suggestions for where to put it with minimal setup?

@nonparticular oh, don't worry about it! i know very little about technology xD i can just try googling dw!

question, trans name stuff, birth names ment. 

@ratsdontcry my parents chose to hyphenate their last names so as a kid instead of writing out both full last names i just wrote T-K. it was never really a nickname but one girl in middle school called me that exclusively and i liked it so when i wanted to stop going by my first name i picked that! i鈥檓 not sure what i鈥檓 gonna do about it legally though lol

question, trans name stuff, birth names ment. 

@TK i was actually really intrigued about how you got yours.. that's cool i really like it! hmm i guess that could be tricky.. i hope you figure something out though :)

question, trans name stuff, birth names ment. 

@ratsdontcry my parents chose names for both assigned at birth sexes, incl middles names. I vibed with the name (diff from my only nickname) cause it鈥檚 unique, I liked the middle names cause one is my dad鈥檚 name and the other has an important meaning.
So I basically just swapped to the other name they would鈥檝e given me!

question, trans name stuff, birth names ment. 

@Gianttardigayde that sounds really cool! it's great that you liked all of the names 馃挏

question, trans name stuff, birth names ment. 

@ratsdontcry none of the above. I started looking for a name that had to have a nice right to it but I didn't want to know anyone by that name (so I could think of myself when hearing that name, not them) and I wanted it to be different from my dead name.
An ex girlfriend of mine helped me come up with names, and I think she was the one bringing up "Alina"? I really liked it and it stuck.

Oh my, that's been almost 13 years now :o

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Une instance se voulant accueillante pour les personnes queers, f茅ministes et anarchistes ainsi que pour leurs sympathisant路e路s. Nous sommes principalement francophones, mais vous 锚tes les bienvenu路e路s quelle que soit votre langue.

A welcoming instance for queer, feminist and anarchist people as well as their sympathizers. We are mainly French-speaking people, but you are welcome whatever your language might be.